Who am I?

I'm Santoki. Just a 48 year old mom dealing with a lot of mental health crap (burnout, ADHD, chronic PTSD (mainly traumatic medical events (difficult pregnancy/son's premature birth; son's diagnosis of acute lymphoblastic leukemia/lymphoma; husband's broken hip; and parent's recent terminal diagnosis), MDD (major depressive disorder) and GAD (generalized anxiety disorder)) by playing video games, mainly Fortnite.  I am trying to be kinder and more true to myself by unmasking years of coping mechanisms.   I was unemployed for a bit (6 months) and just started a very flexible part-time legal job because, tbh, I missed it.

I use Fortnite to chill and bond with my kids (a 9yo boy that beat cancer & an amazing 6yo girl).  I'm part of an amazing community **[Fortnite_over 40 (F40)](https://www.reddit.com/r/Fortnite_Over40/)** and have made some really great friends.  I started streaming for fun and I am really enjoying this whole thing. I'll be streaming casual, F40 league and FML competitive (*social for me*) play; Battle Royale and other game modes; build and combat practice; and more. 

***BE WARNED:***  this is a PG-13+++ aka an ADULT stream which includes profanities and some innuendo (especially if it's after 9:00 PM aka "after dark").
*[updated August 30, 2025]*